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Home - S - Sandwich Jokes

What do vampires make sandwiches out of?
Self-raising dead.

Knock knock.
Who's there?
Crispin.
Crispin who?
Crispin crunchy frog sandwich.

Two men were working on a construction site. When lunchtime came, one of them took out a box of sandwiches.
"Fish paste and tomato," he moaned, as he bit into the first.
"More fish paste and tomato," he muttered as he ate the second.
"Fish paste and tomato?" his friend asked as he picked up the third sandwich.
"Yes," sighed the man. "I hate fish paste and tomato."
"Why don't you ask your wife to make you something different?"
The man looked at him strangely.
"I don't have a wife ? I make my sandwiches myself."

A little demon came home from school one day and said to his mother, "I hate my sister's guts."
"All right," said his mother, "I won't put them in your sandwiches again."

Girl: Can you eat spiders?
Boy: Why?
Girl: One's just crawled into your sandwich.

Bring me a crocodile sandwich immediately.
I'll make it snappy, sir.

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