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Did you hear about the child who was so ugly that his parents hired an actor to play him in their home movies?

A man in a movie theater notices what looks like a bear sitting next to him. "Are you a bear?" he asks.
"Yes."
"What are you doing at the movies?"
"Well, I liked the book."

Which space movie stars Count Dracula?
The Vampire Strikes Back.

A man sat playing chess with a dog in a pub. A stranger came in and sat down and in amazement watched them playing. When they had finished the game he came over. "I'm a movie producer," he explained as he introduced himself. "Your dog could make a fortune in Hollywood."

The man just shrugged. "He's not that clever," he said dismissively. "I've just beaten him three times in the last four games."

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