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Home - C - Clinton Jokes - One Liners

Clinton's Quickies - A collection of short jokes and one liners
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Why did Bill Clinton buy an etch-a-sketch?
To record his foreign policy.

Q: What does Teddy Kennedy have that Bill Clinton wishes HE did?
A: A dead girlfriend.

On 60 Minutes Bill Clinton said his marital difficulties were behind him.
Apparently they're still 4 inches in front of him.

Hillary to Bill on honeymoon:
Hey Bubba do you want fries with this?

Why does Monica Lewinsky have such puffy cheeks? She's withholding evidence

Don King was thinking about promoting a fight between Mike Tyson and Monica Lewinsky, but he called it off when Bill Clinton told him that Monica doesn't bite.

Q: How many Bill Clintons does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None -- He'll only promise to change it.

Q: What is Bill's definition of safe sex?
A: When Hillary is out of town.

What does Bill tell Hillary after sex? Nothing, she hears about it on the evening news

What's Monica going to title her memoirs? "How to suckseed in the Oval Office without really trying!"

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