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"I told you to draw a picture of a cow eating grass," said the art teacher.
"Why have you handed in a blank sheet of paper?"
"Because the cow ate all the grass - that's why there's no grass."
"But what about the cow?" "
There wasn't much point in it hanging around when there was nothing to eat, so it went back to the barn."
What's a ghost's favorite work of a art?
A very posh lady was walking around an art gallery when she stopped by one particular exhibit.
suppose this picture of a hideous witch is what you would call modern art?" she asked very pompously.
"No, ma'am," replied the assistant, "it's what we call a mirror."
Why are art galleries like retirement homes for teachers?
Because they're both full of old masters.
Fred imagined herself a brilliant artist. But his teacher said he was so bad it was a wonder he could draw breath.
Why are vampires artistic?
They're good at drawing blood.
Did you hear about
the two little boys who found themselves in a modern art gallery
"Quick," said one, "run ! Before they say we did it !"
What do you call an American drawing?
A Yankee Doodle.
An artist at an exhibition was approached by a foolish woman. 'Oh, how wonderful
to meet you!' she said. 'I'd like to buy one of your paintings. Do they have a
'Only when I draw big boats,' said the artist.
What is an artist's favourite subject for drawing?
What a rare work of art!
I'd agree it's not well done.
Why are a lot of famous artists Dutch?
Because they were born in Holland.
Did you hear about the artist who was so bad he couldn't even draw breath?
How can you tell when an artist is unhappy?
When he draws a long face.
A snobbish lady was being shown around a London art gallery.
'I suppose you call that painting a work of art,' she said to the gallery owner.
'No,' he replied,' I call that a mirror.'
I met an artist the other day who is never short of money.
How's that? I thought all artists were poor.
Not this one - he's always drawing cheques.